Tuesday, April 30, 2019

My experience on Qantas air travel to New Zealand Via Brisbane


The Facebook whenever I open asks what's on your mind. Many things come to mind some that should be shared and some that should not be shared. Here is one that needs to be.
Just returned from a long vacation in Australia and NZ. Our ticket was booked on @Qantas airways as I wanted to make best use of a transit Visa converting it to visitors Visa.
The tag line of Qantas is Spirit of Australia. For some time in jest Spirit I mistook for hard drinks as Ozzis are fond of Beer.
Well my problems started. May be that's their rule, I had to fill a booklet of twelve pages starting with my name to my entire genealogy. Fortunately I had authored a booklet on my family of 300 yrs, I could easily do it.
Then the next step was to get a comfortable seat in the aircraft with suitable meals packet. I learnt that this airways does operate a flight but has leased it's licence to Jetstar Australia and jet airways India.
Our ticket was an economy ticket (and we cannot afford a business class) and it was true to it's name very economical with space. Airavata of KSRTC would probably qualify as business class in comparison. The seats are so cramped you should be a Lilliput of Gullivers travel to be seated comfortably. Adding insult or spice the air hostess welcomes you with an artificial smile for a comfortable travel and ready to serve you with pleasure.
The food - if you don't tell them early you will have to eat whatever they give you.The Google had told me that food on Australian airlines usually contains egg. Being a very conservative vegetarian I asked for Jain meal to be sure and safe egg free food. But after I got my first taste of VJML in their parlance I don't know whether I should change my view on Jain food or what airlines concieve as Jain food. As for as I am concerned with many Jain friends I knew their food was as tasty as we eat except for eggs, roots and less spice.
And at Singapore we were asked to change flights this time to a real Qantas aircraft after walking 2kms and a sky train travel to another terminal. There were no announcements as Changi thinks it causes noise pollution.Querying well dressed soft spoken Changi airport staff with their broken English reached the terminal safely exhausted.
This aircraft was decently big with bigger seats and space probably because we had a eight hour stay in the sky. Only stern looking tall male stewards with an Australian accent took away the enthusiasm of travel. The VJML already tasted once even made my appetite go away. And we were served the meals probably with that contemptuous look suggesting me - do you really eat this. There was no way and I muttered yes I do as my son is waiting to receive me alive at Brisbane..
Once we arrived we had to fill out a card called disembarkation card. Some how the word did not gel with my thoughts. See (Disembarkation - Wikipedia)
The card contained a questionnaire asking all sorts of queries except telling me "you are not welcome here"
If you answer all as no you are in trouble and if you answer yes to all you are in bigger trouble. These airports treat you and look at you as an escaping criminal with gold, drugs and cash on your body.
Not less than seven uniformed personnel of either gender verified us and our bonafide, and the luggage we had to make sure that I was not one of the citizens of England sent some two centuries back to this place.
After six days of stay with my friend's son who treats me like his father we had to board a flight to Wellington.One good thing is guests can drop us to boarding place here with no restrictions and he was there all through. The flight went to Sydney and from there we had to change flights to Wellington.It was again a hard walk and bus journey from domestic to International. A bus took us but we had to wait for the bus.The men controlling were made of sterner stuff with no smile on their face and an uncourteous warning to all of us to wait for the bus.
And at Sydney International we had to walk a km. Probably I was walking and walking all the while I felt.
And suddenly the Jetstar popped out to carry us. A wee bit bigger and the same ambience and food. One thing I learnt in four different aircrafts was we were the only two eating what Qantas calls as VJML.
The aircrafts through out were carrying sixty percent senior citizens and at 73 I looked the youngest and so I could not claim any benefit of being old.
The next part is the real killer which will follow a little later.......
Continued....Part 2..
@QANTAS AIRWAYS. the spirit of Australia.
After a month long vacation in NZ I had to return. All good things come to an end. But about bad things no body has told anything.Should they also end. No they never go away. Misfortunes and military vehicles never come alone.
Our ticket was already there but unfortunately our agent had not picked the seats. There is a provision to check-in 24 hrs ahead on line and fix your seats. But the great Australian spirit does not allow you. Some allow before twelve hours but the spirit has different connotation . No you cannot. Go to airport.The booking opens two hours before only. To comply I lost all my spirits.Had to hurry to airport, already a line had formed. You have to follow whatever is said in airports and more so when you are in a foriegn country. Small mistakes get amplified to your disadvantage. If you are inside a craft gets amplified manyfold. Likely to be thrown out. Be careful about this.
Well when our turn came we presented our passports. An elderly looking lady at the counter measured us with her eyes and started doing what was required. We asked for desired seats but she would just nod. When we got the boarding pass we had seats together in the immediate flight but I forgot about connecting ones. She had allotted seats near toilets and I thought she had forethought having handled so many elderly citizens with nature frequently telling us that we are old. One disadvantage is the clatter of cuttlery behind you.
This time we had tall good looking but very reserved stewards and air hostesses.. A look that said don't ever mess with me. Flight started on time and the aircraft was from a Jetstar club again
But the seats were appearing less cramped probably because we had got used to it and expectations were less.
The food was a rehash VJML. Fortunately the hostess did not ask me any thing and I knew what it was. It was called break fast A hard rotti filled with some veggies.we simply ate it as we had no choice.
After four hours landed at Sydney. Bright morning and I was looking through windows for Opera house which I could not locate. My friend told me that no aircraft lands there before 6.00 am as citizens object to the noise and airport obliges.
Another km walk landed me in the desired terminal.
We got in to the aircraft a big bodied Airbus 330. Now again we got seats at the rear but together to listen to the clatter of crockery.
Seats were reasonably comfortable. An announcement from the pilot sent a warning. I will be in control of aircraft and you all for the next eight hours.welcome. The stewards were men only. But looked aged. They were doing their job mechanically and with a tired face. It was not a welcome sign showing the spirit of Australia.
My mind was really wondering how can this contraption fly for eight hours with 300 people and their baggage their food , and it's own fuel. Wonder.
Yes it was time to eat. They started with us only as I had told earlier that we were the only ones eating VJML.
The drama unfolded. Half way through I started feeling some long thread stuck in my mouth. With help of a tissue I pulled it out and to my horror it was a long grey hair in my dish. I smiled to myself . It was from an old lady of unknown origin. How I wish it was from a blonde Aussie .( My mind getting influenced by the film I was watching "Gentleman prefer blondes).

Continued..-- Part three
@QANTAS AIRWAYS.
The last part of our journey started from Singpore after alighting from Qantas.
Once again the silent Changi welcomed us. The silence was killing. We had to follow electronic boards here and there. I asked a few good Changians and of course one lady asked me to take sky train to terminal three. And tongue in cheek said walk if you can. I preferred train as I had done earlier. There was not much time. Only two hours to next flight. We were just walking to a new terminal that has been built for Bengaluru flights from there. After walking and travelling on travellators it took 30 mts to reach the boarding area.
I just checked while I was in previous flight and to my horror saw the boarding pass and pissed off. That lady in Welly had given us seats one behind the other. Let no body separate the ones who are united here, says a marriage vow. But this lady had done exactly opposite. Qantas spirit of Australia.
Exhausted we went to check in for an x-ray but that Changian said wait there is no space to sit.
We went back a few metres and occupied seats. Fortunately there were free WiFi spots and I could satsfy my hunger for net but no hotel to fill my stomach.
It was 6.20 I went to check in and entered the area.Had to pass through a body scanner. No I was not carrying anything prohibited. I went to boarding area and told him the predicament of seats. He looked at the boarding pass and woh what a mess. Tapped on his computer and gave two neibouring seats in front.And even said sorry. Singapore is Singapore. Their spirit they need not announce.
Boarding. It was jet airways.I thought not many passengers. But they were coming in like in the car of that Jerry Lewis film. Went in and our seat. Alas the leg space was hardly enough. Feeling hungry the VGML was tasting like feast.
But half way through nature sounded the alarm bell and when I looked at the way to toilet at the other end three carts were still serving food. I reached the first cart and good a looking hostess told me sir, you can't go now. I reminded her it was nature that is forcing me and if you don't allow it may take revenge on all of us here. A gentleman made some space, I sqeezed in and the cart moved back I walked to next . Encore twice I was there. People filled the tube like aircraft with no spare space. I wondered at the airlines capacity to get every inch of space earn money and still lose money. No wonder airlines is a vanity business can't leave once stuck in. We were totally exhausted with legs aching and every part of body crying for a rest and relax.
No embarkation card for returning natives sign put some hope. It was sailing through in KGIA. The baggage was late with one of my suit cases minus the TSA approved lock and a zip lock open. Mr Mahesh our friendly driver waiting for us reached home safely and literally hit the bed.
That was the saga of Australian Spirit. Next time choose your airline carefully. Don't get fooled by the slogan and ads.
@Qantas are you reading.